i want to be here, but i want to be there.

i hate decision making. but sadly, its part of life.

Melbourne, would be beautiful i think. and really fun. and really nice.
but going for it would mean that my parents have to spend money on me again.
i could work, but there isn't enough time.
i could pay them back next time.
but sk isn't going. and i don't know if the trip will be fun without her.
but fanny is going. so i guess its ok.
but its from 4-9 october and i would miss your passing out parade.
but i really want to go to Melbourne.
but i don't want you to be unhappy.
but..... i don't know if i should go.

i hate decision making.

no i didn't. right?

someone told me that dogs will bark at people who ate dog meat.
i went to china and back. don't know if i had any dog meat. but i'm very sure that my neighbour's dogs haven't been very friendly towards me recently. hope its just me. love dogs. wont wanna eat them. rather eat pigeons. just saying.

i spent the afternoon packing clothes that i dont wear anymore. gonna get a booth at flb7. cannot wait.

anyway, i'm looking forward to the weekends, counting down every week.
will get my prime lens by this week and go shopping for some assignment materials.
filming at botanical garden on fri.
photoshoot on monday and i'm hoping that it would turn out well.
 i've been too lazy recently. time to get my shit together.

over and over

i keep telling myself that i must be nicer to people but people keep doing things that makes me want to stab them. maybe not stab them. but.. ya. you know. even if you don't, pretend you do. (:

Hi school.

sometimes i miss Dalian. 

like when i get a cockroach in my room late at night when i'm trying to get my work done. cause that never happened to me in Dalian. 

like when i dont know what to eat and think of the street food in Dalian.

like when a cup of fruit juice costs $1.60 but in china, i could get it for around $0.60.

like when i have to travel the long distance to be in school and remember how lesson was just a 10 mins walk in Dalian. 

like when people asks me what i've learnt from the trip and i dont know. but all i know is that i enjoyed the trip. 

not that being back in sg doesn't feel good. but i just miss China at times. 

love their art street. just saying.

oh by the way, i'm still feeling stupid bout printing and binding my journal at the shop. 56 dollars in total.  i could have... bought this, and that. oh well.........

life's lesson

close an eye and we'll all be happier. 

there is so much to update but i can't cause i'm so busy and lazy. 

its just me. and my last minute shit. sorry. even though there is no need to apologise. 

i just decided that i should be nicer to everyone. this world should be friendlier.

i will. i will blog bout china, my birthday, and what i've been feeling recently. 

haha. yes. i will. if you believe me. 

best i ever had.

And i got to thank you all for making it so special for me.

with sincere love,
me.

anyway, today was really good. and i'm genuinely happy. (:

Emotion bubble.

My birthday used to be just another day. 

but this 19th one was kinda.. different. I can't really put it in words. but it was a confusing difference for my heart and my mind. 

I dont know if i'm happy about the difference because there is just so much emotions in me right now.

up side, i see how much some cared. 

down side, i see how much some cannot be bothered. 

but anyway, i've decided to stop expecting so much from the world. or people. 

need to be stronger and happier because we're only young once. 

Happy Birthday to me.

thoughts fighting thoughts

sometimes, i just get so sick of living up to everyone's expectations.

you?

can't just forget about the pricetag

China totally woke me up. Y'know, after i came back from China, I kinda lost my ability to shop cause i find everything so crazily overpriced. guess i'm just gonna shop at run down fleas.

shattered

couldn't blog at all for the past few days/weeks cause onsugar was being a total bitch. well, round and round and i'm back to blogger.